Rules of Cell Phone Signal

Published June 15, 2011 by jrm17

Living where I do, my lack of signal is frightening sometimes.  We’re talking I spend my time outside when my friends are texting me just so I don’t have to run in and out of my house (Thankfully, iPod speakers, a hammock and my book collection save my sanity).  Having formed a habit of this since sometime around junior year of high school, I’ve learned a few things.

Rule #1: Always charge your iPod.  I don’t know how many times my flakiness has caused me to be mid-conversation and mis-chapter and my iPod dies.  I maybe the only person out there who feels this way but there is such a thing as too quiet…and that’s what happens when there’s no music in my back yard. 

Rule #2: Always wear shoes.  It’s summer (or close enough for those of you who actually pay attention to the whole calendar thing) and, therefore, I take every opportunity I get to not wear anything on my feet.  This isn’t such a good idea when your wandering around the yard and step on a rock…and then another and then another (or in my case, the same rock three times).

Rule #3: Bring supplies.  This means drinks and sweatshirts and extra batteries and extra books and any other necessity.  Last night, for example, it was really cold for being June.  I was too stupid and lazy to go inside to get a hoodie so I suffered.

Rule #4: Buy bug spray.  Okay, so it doesn’t have to be bug spray but something to keep the bugs away because they are the most annoying thing in the world–especially when you end up with somewhere around 15 mosquito bites.

Rule #5: Get comfy.  If you’re anything like me and Whit, your conversations potentially last all day so you better make yourself comfortable if you’re in for the long haul.  Last night included a huge blanket, my new speakers, my new book, and a few bug repellant candles (I seriously hate bugs).  Sadly, however, my cell decided to only get service on the rock pathway we have…not the most cushy place to spend your evening.

Rule #6: Don’t throw your phone.  I know it’s really hard to not smash it against something when it refuses to send very important texts despite saying it has signal but at all costs, resist the temptation.  I know from experience that throwing it is never a good idea.  If yours is as temperamental as mine, then it won’t receive your messages for like three days after because it’s mad at you–even if you throw it against something soft and it decides on its own to bounce and hit something hard.

Finally, the most important rule is Rule #7: Make sure everyone knows your service sucks.  If they don’t understand this, then you will get annoying (and stupid) texts asking how you plan on making calls.  Or your friends will get mad because you take forever to respond.  Lucky for me, my bestie has been to my house and understands the situation.



2 comments on “Rules of Cell Phone Signal

  • I have the same exact problem, I live at the bottom of a black hole. I have to leave my phone plugged in and at the farthest corner of the house by a window all day just to make sure I can send/recieve most messages. Even with that in mind it still fails here and there. Lets not forget the hour long wait for pic messages.

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